Chapter 9
How long did you take to forget the last person you loved?
That person, who knew everything about you.
That person, who you gave your first kiss to.
The person who knows,
What you like most.
What you hate most.
What makes you cry.
What makes you laugh.
What songs you keep inside your mp3 player.
Which date is your birthday?
When was the last time you cried?
That person who was your universe and the source of life.
Then a sudden twist of fate and wicked destiny shipwrecked your relationship with that person.
You cried endlessly as there was no other means of releasing your downfall.
You even took sleeping pills just to make yourself weak and sleepy.
Every time you hear the song played on radio will stir your emotions once more.
Although you don’t accept, the truth is always the most painful piece of information you have to bear.The person is no longer with you.
You tried to forget, you make new friends.
You thought all the late night partying will relocate your mind.
You just can’t forget that person.
You can only slowly remembering him/her less.
Until one day when you are bathing and suddenly that person came to your mind.
That’s probably the time you know you had already forgotten him/her.
Mark had never seen such a tree in his life as he advanced ahead.
It was the only tree in the park with red leaves.
There was a warm yet sad feeling felt through him as he looked at the red leaves.
“The tree nice?”Mark turned around.
A young man stands behind him.
The man looked a few years younger than him as he walked forward.
“You’re Glen?”
“Yeah… and you are Mark?”
“Yup… you know it’s kinda gay to see two men standing in front of a tree in the evening.”
“Well, this is the tree at its nicest”
Glen walked towards a bench not far away.
“Let’s sit there”Glen offered.
As the wind blew gentling through the setting sun, the two men sit side by side admiring the beauty of nature.
“My name is Glen, or Yang if you’ve seen the book”Glen finally spoke.
“The person whom I’ve written about is June, or Ying”
“What happened to her?”Mark wanted to know.
“She died… of brain cancer”
“And you didn’t do anything to help?”
“How can I help? What can a 16-year-old student do at that time? Besides I don’t even know she was sick”
“What about you? What happened to you?”
Glen turned the attention to Mark.
“I just watched my girl died in front of me”
“How long had it since been?”
“Coming to five years”
“And you blame yourself all these while? You caused her death?”
Mark tried not to look into his eyes.
“If I’ve listen to her that day, if I’ve not insist on going. She would have accompanied me and got drown”
“How long are you going to blame yourself?”
Mark didn’t answer.
“Forever?”
There was no response.
“Do you think it’s fair for the next girl who you may like? To carry the sorrows and memories of your ex girlfriend?”
“Then you asking me to forget about her?”
Mark finally responded.
“But did you ever ask yourself, you are holding on because of love or guilt?”
“I really don’t know…”
“It’s time to let go, letting go doesn’t mean you are to forget about her all together. Letting go is about safekeeping her in a special of your memories. This girl will always be a part of you, even when you’ve got yourself a family in future.”
Glen looked at Mark before continued.
“You know what was her last wish before she died?”
Mark shook his head.
“She hopes that I will not blame her that she left me just like that”
“So did you blame yourself?”
“I wish I could because I find life so meaningless. But on the other hand I have to promise her I will live well and June will always be in my heart and my memories for as long as I live.”
“Thanks…”
That was the only thing that Mark can offer.
“Live a fruitful life… because you should not waste your life over this”
“I will…”
The sun finally set as Glen made his way to the tree for one last touch.
Then the two men then head for separate ways.
It was the first time and probably the last time that both of them will see each other.
Mark had his answers.
It was something he knew all along but refused to accept.
He could not let go because of guilt.
Because he was the one who incidentally killed her.
When Mark reached home, he sat in front of his computer for a long time.
Then he entered his post.
“Today I met someone who went through the same ordeal as me. He is much younger than me but somehow I feel that he’s much more mature.
The time that he spent with her is much lesser than I am with Jade.
He didn’t even realize that the girl died until he received the parcel from her father.
Sometimes the purest of all love comes when you are young and innocent. Knowing the love for each other is more important than the practical world and reality.
Maybe he is right, I’m still walking in circles, as I could not let go of the past.
I know it’s hard to forget that someone whom suddenly disappear from you life totally.
I will try and I hope I will succeed.”
Mark then took a bath and watched some TV before returning to bed.
As he was about to switch off his computer, he saw a tag.
It was Psyche again.
“Do you know what would be Jade’s last wish?”
“It’s not important anymore”
Mark typed on his tag board.
“So you finally decided to let of her?”
Psyche replied.
“The best things in life aren’t always the things you need, they can be the things you miss very much. If that makes her happy, I will let go”
There was a moment of pause before Psyche replied with the longest post Mark has ever seen.
“At Last, the road is long, somehow there’s still a lot of undiscovered path for us to venture. Sometimes we find ourselves trapped in some unwanted situations, We are what we make up of ourselves, if we worked our ways according to our hearts, there’s no need to feel upset when u fail but rejoice when u succeed!”
Mark suddenly felt that Psyche is someone who knows him very well. Whatever thoughts he had, Psyche seems to be able to know before hand.
“Can you finally tell me who you are?”
Mark asked again.
“I’m Psyche, Wife of Eros.”
“What is your purpose of posting?”
Mark asked in frustration.
“To see how much you know about love.”
That was Psyche’s last message of the night.
[ To be Cont ]
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