Book of Love 爱神の书

Chapter 5

There was once a man who had a nightingale that could draw envy of everyone that heard it’s singing.

The man was very proud of his asset and vow to treat the bird with the finest food and best of living.

The one day, one of his sons asked.
“Father, do you think the bird love you?”

“Why not? I give it the best of the available there is. Its food and its living in the finest of cage to rest”

The son was puzzled.
“Father, if you love the bird so much why do you lock it inside a cage?”

The man had no answer.
He was afraid that the bird would fly away and never return.

“If the bird loves you, it will never fly away from you”
The boy continued.

The man looked at his son and did what he was told to.
He slowly released the cage and set the bird free.

The nightingale flew up upon the sky and circle around the man.
The man then tried to whistle and signal the bird to return.

However the bird did not comply.
It flew higher and further away from the man never once turn it’s head to look back.

The man was devastated.

Days passed, weeks went by.
There was no sign of the bird.
Every day the man would look up in the sky in vain hoping that the bird will return one day.

The man had given up all hopes of finding the bird.
Finally he realized that love is something that cannot be forced.
As the man slowly walked into his house, he heard the nicest chirping sound that ever produced.
It sounded like a beautiful ballad being played in the open.

He looked up and saw two nightingales flying towards his house.
It looked the same one that he had let go.

The nightingale had found itself a love mate and brought it with her back to the old man’s house. It was chirping merrily along with the male nightingale as they landed on the old man’s hands.

“If you love someone very much then will you let go of her?”

Cold sweat felt through Mark’s hand as he moved to the keyboard to type.

“Are you Jade?”

Mark knew it was impossible.
Jade had gone for such a long time.

There was no reply.

Again he waited, until the group was back from lunch.

“What happened to you man?”
Shaun looked at the pale Mark.

“You looked as if you’ve saw a ghost”

“Worse…”
Mark was trembling as he told Shaun about the ‘Pschye’ that replied his blog and the dream that he dreamt last night.

“Wow… that’s pretty exciting you know!”
Shaun exclaimed.

“I guess it’s just a coincidence because there’s no prove that implies these two events are directly related.”

Mark didn’t reply as Shaun went to fetch him a cup of warm water.

“Why don’t you take half a day’s rest? I’ll go tell boss on your behalf”
Shaun patted his back as he made his move into the boss’s office.
Mark slowly packed his briefcase and left the office.
He was still unable to recover from the events that had happened.

Was it really a coincidence?

Mark didn’t know for sure.

He had hoped it wasn’t.
He missed Jade very much.
It felt as if it was only yesterday when he last felt her hands.
But deep down he knew it was impossible.
He was the one who dress her up on her deathbed.
He was the one who put the roses in her cold hands.
He was the one who didn’t listen to her advice.
He was the one who caused her death.

Mark walked into a café nearby his office.
He just wanted a place to sit down and reorganized his thoughts.
As he tried to reach for his wallet in his briefcase to pay for his coffee, Mark felt something else inside.

It was the storybook that he borrowed yesterday.

“The book of life at 15”

Mark found a couch at the far corner of the café and began reading the book.

It was on her twelfth birthday when she was married to another family as part of daughter-in-law / servant deal.
Her mother-in-law was a wicked lady whose seventh year old son was a mentally handicapped.
The girl had to wake up in the wee hours to fetch water from the well that was several kilometers away.
She had to be back before five in order to prepare breakfast for the family.
There was once she was late due to the rain had caused a landslide somewhere near the well. She had to go further to fetch the water. However, she came back late and was severely beaten by her mother-in-law.

Mark took a yawn as he flips through the next page.
He then saw the same hand written quote somewhere below.

“If you love someone, you must learn to let go.
If your love is felt, she will return one day.”

Mark jumped up from his couch in surprised.

Mark was no longer interested in the story.
He then quickly flipped through all the pages to search for more hand written quotes.

Mark found the quotes.

“I know it’s my fault but I must go on, I must live for you”

The he eagerly flipped through again.

“I missed you very much, somehow I know you must be miserable alone”

Finally Mark came to the last page of the storybook.

It was supposed to be a blank page but there were paragraphs hand written on the page.

Mark began reading.

“Ying ,

“The same smile will always be there along with the rosy cheek that blushes each time happiness is felt within you. The eyes of innocent youth will look forever the same..”

Some things haven’t change isn’t it? I wish so much everyday that I could see you once more, not only in dreams but in reality.

I want to feel you so much but I guess it seems impossible now. The days that you’ve gone has come to a hundred and it seems like only yesterday we were having those little strolls along the park behind our house.

Sometimes I want to tell you how much I love you, how much I’m willing to do for you, how much I would rather give half my life to God in exchange for your presence.

But I guess all this ain’t gonna be true once more. You had left me to walk with God in heaven. The little angels send me a dream of you last night. It was about how we first met. Of course, I would not forget about it .. but yesterday was like history relived.

Knowing you was a blessing but having you by my side was a miracle indeed. Somehow I never thought I was of your standards.
You were like the angel with the most beautiful wings spread open whereas I was only a lowly being who look so inhumanly from young.
That’s why I’ve always treasure your attention so much.

Time… I think is a very strange thing. When you’re with someone you love. It always seems so short… but when you’re missing someone… time always seems so long.

One of the happiest moments in my life would be our first date.
Those days of being young are coming back to me once more. You looked great with the red dress with floral design all over.

I never think cosmetics make us a better person, especially you. For you had the rosiest cheeks without the enhancement of artificial product.

Remembering back the date.. when we said walking was a form of romantic expression when money was really the main problem? I remembered how we walked from the whole east coast beach to your house at katong. No one has ever calculated how much we’ve walked over the years.

Perhaps a few hundred kilometers ?

I think you must be lonely being alone in the clouds of heaven sometimes. You always dread about loneliness didn’t you? I could remember the times you often complained about the loneliness you felt being the only child in your family…

Loneliness is something which we all will feel throughout our lives. I do hope the angels above can spread their wings of love upon you. I will be strong, I will be mindful of my actions, my speech and my desire. I will lead life as much as you want me to, I will live for you.

Taking life each day as it comes, nothing will be too big a barrier, nothing will be too small to be left unnoticed. I will wake up each day a happier person because life itself is a gift, a gift from the creator of heavens.

As I looked back to the days we’ve spent, knowing that memories will only be there for me to relive once more.

I thank the lord above for the gift of life, even though sometimes life is miserable when we fall, the strength that we develop to pick ourselves up is something not things that are taught, these are the things that we are supposed to learn. Lastly, I love you, and you know I really do. Please wait for me….

Yang,”

The wreath inside him was released the moment he finished reading. Mark just couldn’t control himself as he cried in the café.

He knew there were eyes that were lurking on him as people surrounding him were surprised that a full grown adult crying in the middle of the afternoon in a café.

“Sir, are you ok?”
The waitress came on to check.

“Yeah.. I’m fine.. sorry”
Mark said while wiping his tears.

“Don’t be… it’s good to let your heart out once in a while. This book must really be a sad story.”

“No.. It’s not because of the book. It’s something within me. I’ve been bearing with it for a long time already.”

“Then you should let go. Carrying a heavy burden all by yourself is miserable”

“Yes.. I’ve finally thought through it.”
Mark let out a sigh.

“Great! Sir, please enjoy your coffee then”
Mark looked at the waitress’s nametag as he took a sip of coffee .

“Sharon, You know something?”
“Yes?”

“Coffee actually taste bitter when you are sad”

“Of course, when you are sad you won’t feel the sweetness”

“Oh before I forget. I’m Mark Lee”
Mark reach out his hand for a handshake.

The waitress smiled and shook his hand.

Mark walked out the café a happier person that day.
However, he was interested in finding out the person who wrote on the book.

Somehow he felt closeness to the person named “Yang”.

What had he been through?

Did both of them suffer the same fate?

The only answer was to trace the borrower from the library database.
Mark then proceeded to the library.

-------------------

“Hi, I would like to check the previous borrower of this book please?”
Mark approached the stern librarian.

“I’m sorry Sir, we do not provide such services”

“Why?”

“We do not review any particulars/information of any members to anyone”

“Look, I’m serious here. That person is a close friend of mine.
Somehow I lost his contact numbers and now I have something which I need to pass back to him personally.”

The librarian did not response.

“Ok, you check for me and call the person for me. This way you won’t reveal any information to me and I can get in contact with him. Deal?”

“Alright.. you look urgent enough”
The librarian takes over the book and scans it.

Mark was waiting eagerly.

“Sir. Is your name Mr. Mark Lee?”

“Yes? That’s me”

“This book has only been borrowed once.. and the borrower is by the name Mark Lee”

[To be Cont]